Why Halloween is super, and other tales

Yesterday was the fun-filled conclusion of Cleveland Beer Week, which included much quality friend time, out-of-city visitors and adorable miniature beer steins with a doctored (to say BEER) FREE stamp logo on them. It was pretty wonderful and delicious.

But that's not why you're here, exactly (although, the fact that there's a homebrewing group called the Society of Northeast Ohio Brewers -- allowing them to get the Web site beersnobs.org -- is pretty fantastic and grin-worthy). You're here, instead, so I can tell you that when we were driving in, I saw a man driving past in white face-paint, done up like a mime. But with glasses, which makes it all the more surreal.

And so I can tell you that a friend of mine, who body paints in his free time, painted two friends and myself as a dog, a cat and a mouse one October a few years ago. We bought tails and ears and looked the part, and decided the perfect thing to do was to go out to a bar.

And can you believe that not a single person -- not the waitress, not anyone we walked past -- even mentioned our attire? Lesson learned: dress up oddly in non-October months for maximum effect. The process and the company were still entertaining, though.

Animals in the street

But in a good way. Not in a bad way.

This weekend, my friends and I stumbled on the Lakewood pet parade. Dogs in costumes are kind of fantastic. There were a couple people dressed as Cruella de Vil with their dogs -- which were not Dalmatians -- sporting Dalmatian costumes. One of my co-workers had the family dog in a life vest and a Salty Dog hat. There were vikings, a lobster and any other number of adorably clad canines.

The winners, my co-worker said, were a dog duo: a pug that was wearing horns and made to look like a bull (and was apparently very realistic) and another, smaller dog, that was made up like a bull fighter.

Yesterday, there was a mounted policeman (as in, a man on a horse) on the streets downtown. And this morning, there was a truck with four trailers attached, all with the Ringling name on the sides. It was very Dumbo.

Holy Boss's Day, Batman!

My brother has a job where he is in charge of people. He keeps claiming that these people like him, but I thought that was just something that brothers said to sisters to prove how awesome they are. Until tonight.

Friday, as you may have known, was Boss's Day. It's the best day for sucking up to someone who decides whether you keep your job -- well, the best day other than every other day. And my brother's employees went all out.

The card wasn't enough. Nor was the sign they made describing him as "Da Boss." A cassata cake, delicious as it was (And man, was it delicious. And gigantic. I think it was a full sheet.) just didn't cut it.

On top of all of that (and that's obscene already, from where I stand!), the co-workers went in together to get him a #23 Cavs jersey -- that's LeBron James' number, for those of you who don't follow basketball.

On the back, though? My brother's name.

I was in hysterics at the efforts, but I guess it means they really do like him!

Let it snow

This is really Danny's tale to tell, but I'm going to take it from him. Because I can. And because he can add his version, too, complete with details.

Text message at 3:03 p.m. Thursday: Omg it's snowing!!

My response, at 3:14 p.m.: :) That's early! A lot? Is it wonderful?

Text message at 3:15 p.m.: Haha! Just flurries, sort of sprinkling rain with it. But yes, I think it's neat, altho no one else seems to

Text message at 5:03 p.m.: I take it back, it's really coming down now!! Haha this is awesome!

He promised pictures.

Other people? Less excited.

I AM the news

OK, I'm not really. But I could have been!

The NBC affiliate called me this afternoon, wanting to interview me for a story that related to an article I wrote last week.

I said no -- I was swamped today, and that's not really my thing anyway -- but it's certainly flattering to be asked.

Balloon magic

There was an article in the Wall Street Journal last week about -- of all things -- the increasing artistry of balloon twisting. As in, the clowns (usually) who make hats or dogs or swords (and I thought a rocking horse was the epitome of cool).

Now, they're way beyond that. And way into installment art. And amazingness.

Check out the slide show. For real.

More bikes!

Two instances of no-handed amazingness, all in one day. I was more impressed by the guy who was riding a bike no-handed while carrying a box -- a decently sized box, too, and he even managed to turn left (though there may have been a hand touchdown) -- than I was the guy who was talking on his cell phone with one hand and smoking with the other. But when he nearly dropped, then juggled, then caught his cigarette, it made it all OK.

As a bikeless bonus, there was also a maroon limo. Has anyone ever seen a maroon limo? I thought not.

Can I toucha-toucha-toucha touch them?

On the shuttle to work (school) this morning, the lady across from me was wearing fishnet stockings. The only other times I've seen them in use has been at the Rocky Horror Picture Show. She looked pretty bad-ass in them too; I wanted to say something, but withheld due to the likely creepiness factor.

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

OK, it's not exact. But it's what I thought of when I saw a license plate that said LORD ICY.

They probably meant: Lord, I see why.

I read it as a shout-out to the White Witch in the Chronicles of Narnia.

It's alarming how charming I feel

One of my (male) coworkers said to my (male) boss this morning, "Wow, you look nice today!"

My boss replied by saying -- then singing -- "I feel pretty." (It doesn't start til the 50-second mark.)

I tried not to guffaw.