Die! Die! Die!

Commentary to come later (I'm late! I'm late!), but I had to pass this along before I lost the link: it's a Lurlene McDaniel snark blog!

Her official Web page is here.

So, for the sake of context: anyone remember those Scholastic book order sheets we got in elementary school? Lurlene McDaniel had a book on there every month. They had titles like Too Young to Die, Baby Alicia is Dying, Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep... you know, perfect for a fifth grader. All about various cancers, teenagers who needed transplants, teenagers living with terminal illnesses. And I became obsessed. My best friend and I couldn't get enough of them.

I would seek them out at used book sales, look for them on friends' book shelves, get stacks out of the library. And they were so, so wonderful in their horridness.

My parents still tease me about all my "dead-people" books. But, shh. If I see them, I'll still get them.

The last one I read was about a car accident, though. She really needs to stick with natural tragedies. Or maybe I need to stop reading them.

Just because it's true

Doesn't mean it's polite to say in mixed company!

The first line of an e-mail from a friend, that had me laughing very loudly (luckily, I was at home to read it and not in my chair at work):

You are. So. So. SO weird.

Just because I want to visit the Columbus Washboard Co. I mean, it's the only washboard manufacturer left in the country! And they give tours!

How can you pass that up?

Sweets

The upstairs neighbors baked Christmas cookies for my roommate and I (and they are delicious)!

Merry Christmas

From the lit Terminal Tower and downtown Cleveland.


I spent my Christmas Eve with latkes, Chinese food and friends new and old. It was a lovely time. And our waiter, who called himself "Jolly Jeff" was absolutely insane. He had all of us falling-out-of-our-seats laughing. It's really too bizarre to properly recount -- to simply say that he was animated doesn't even begin to do him justice. Hysterical.

Punctuation

I got a text message from a friend that employed a semicolon. That rocks.

Deer, deer everywhere

This picture is great.

We used to see deer in the yard all the time when I was growing up. One day, my sister went out to the mailbox and came in to tell my mom about the "big doggy" standing there. Turned out it was a pretty huge buck standing at the end of the driveway.

And for the record, I grew up in the 'burbs.

Happy Hanukkah

Two giant hanukkiahs, including one on Public Square.

More ego boosts

The publisher made his rounds this afternoon to wish us all a happy holiday. He didn't pronounce my name correctly (and I didn't correct him, though I should have), but he said he really liked a story I'd written yesterday.

"You’re off to a really good start," he said.

Christmas music

I'm not one of those people who gets all excited about Christmas music. Or even likes it, really. But I have heard a few that have made me smile.

I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas is really cute. So is The 12 Days of Christmas as sung by the Muppets. Let's be honest: any time the Muppets are on the radio (which is more often than you might expect), it's a reason to smile.

And this version of the 12 days, by Straight No Chaser, is really cool -- and the Hanukkah moment gets the biggest laugh (give it a minute to get into it).

But I'm still waiting to hear You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch. That's my favorite Christmas song, by far.

Balance

Two bike messengers, pedaling down the street with their hands in their pockets. They looked like they were on unicycles (except for that extra wheel).

Snow day

OK, not exactly. But we got a water-main-break day -- the office was closed down at 10 a.m. So it's like a snow day.

I keep trying to convince my brother (who's on break from college) to do something fun with me. But he's totally lame and keeps saying he didn't go to sleep last night, and therefore doesn't have the energy to do anything interesting. So there are probably errands in store for my middle-of-the-week vacation. Which is still OK.

Also, I filled my gas tank for $16! What fun.

People are funny

I have a few sources who I'm connected to through other lives -- I went to high school with their kids, I babysat for them, etc. And it's always nice to talk to them because they have a concept of me as a person -- not just a byline, so to speak. They tend to be a little more excited (and surprised!) when I call.

One of those sources is the father of one of my sister's friends. He just called after seeing a story that I wrote (we send a daily e-mail) to say hi, and that he had read it. Wished me a happy holiday and said he hoped to be sharing more good news, soon.

I thought that was kinda cool.

Aww

I was talking to a source yesterday about how I've bought a coat and gloves, but still need to invest in a scarf. When I got to work this morning, this was in my in-box: Since the temperature will be dropping, I got my hands on a scarf for you. I'll drop it in the mail.

Sweet!

Window washers

There was one rappelling down the side of my building this morning.

On a related note, rappelling is mad fun.

Good TV

I spent part of today catching up on Life, which I think is one of the best shows (along with Mad Men) on the telly these days. It's just so quirky and grin-worthy.

The main character is obsessed with fruit. In one episode, there's a recurring fruit cake theme. Charlie Crews, our main character, says,"It's fruit and it's cake, what's not to like?" Later, while eating it, he concludes that "there's a distinct possibility that this is neither fruit nor cake."

Out of context, it's maybe not laugh-out-loud funny. But the humor's persistent and spot-on. And the series hasn't been canceled yet. So I am joyful.

Side of the road

One is an image, while one requires a bit more of an explanation (or maybe doesn't, but you're getting it anyway).

First, stapled to a telephone pole, a yellow sheet of paper with "He'll be back. Merry Christmas." written in black permanent marker.

Second: The Great Lakes Science Center has a renewable energy exhibit -- a rather prominent windmill, and a number of solar panels outside. I usually don't drive that way, but did tonight. 

Each of the solar panels was bordered by purple Christmas lights. I assume they're solar powered, as well. Pretty and cool.

Santa hat tally

Three, so far, for the day. And only one of them was a white-bearded man. (For the record, he was also clad in jeans and a dark pullover of some sort.)

Sense of humor

The Better Business Bureau apparently has one.

From the article:

A BBB staffer posed as a renter who claimed to live on "Lois Lane" and work for the "Daily Planet" but needed to move soon.
The Superman references were apparently lost on the Nigerian "medical doctor."

This also reminds me of the Animaniacs' (doesn't everything?) song, The Senses.

One of the best things a reporter can hear

When there's a 1:30 deadline:

"Your stuff comes through clean, so 2:00 should be fine."

Twofer

I've been riding the bus to work, when I can. On the way home today, the bill reader was broken. So the ride was free.

And when I checked the mail, there was a hand-addressed envelope -- it was my first piece of real mail at my new home! Hooray!

Grin all weekend!

Airtran is having a sale -- you could come see me for cheap! (That's for all you Atlanta readers. Although you can visit from elsewhere, too. I'll allow it.)

And then we can party like it's 1999. And if you've never been to the Akron airport, I have a feeling you'll have a hard time leaving without a bemused expression. I almost missed a flight back to Atlanta once because I had to explain that the metal stress balls in my carry-on luggage were not bombs. And once I showed off the brightly painted, chiming balls, everyone in security wanted to know where they could get some. (The answer, of course, is Marc's.)

Edit: Delta's on sale, too.

Your new twin-sized bed

Saw a guy pushing a dolly loaded with a twin mattress and box spring down Euclid Ave., one of Cleveland's main drags, at 9:45 on a rainy Tuesday morning (near no housing I could see).

Just an odd thing to see on a downtown street.

Where a kid can be a kid?

This also goes under the amusing-yet-horrifying category.

I've wanted to have an adult birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese's for a little while, now. But this article makes that sound a little scary. The cops get called there more often than they do at biker bars? Wow.

Did you know they served alcohol?

Bye bye, Boston Legal...

Boston Legal makes me smile -- the last episode was tonight, which is sad. But it went out well, shark-jumping and all.

You get to hear about it, though, because of this: When I was on jury duty, one of the questions the attorneys asked the crowd of potential jurors was if we watched any "lawyer shows," and which ones. I said no as people talked about Law & Order's various iterations, and the like. But then someone said Boston Legal. And I had to raise my hand and correct myself -- I told the judge that I watched it, but didn't consider it a lawyer show. Which caused him and the attorneys to chuckle. 

I got picked for the jury, by the way. Boston Legal is de-lawyerly enough that it's not disqualifying.

The same magical animal!

The microwave at work has an auto-cook button for bacon.

Snow

It's snowing again, which is nice as long as you can continue to operate motor vehicles on the road. As I was driving, the snow was still not sticking to the street, but it was pretty heavy -- there's a dusting on the ground. As the wind whipped by, it pulled the snow with it. It looked like sand dunes in the desert, or the current under water. Lovely.

Mail!

I got a letter from Raul today! Thanks, Raul!

Never mind that I wrote it myself (long story). It was more hysterical than I remember. My mother laughed pretty loudly at it, too.

This Love

...has taken its toll on me -- she said goodbye too many times befo-o-o-o-ore...

Whenever this song came on in college, my roommates and I would turn the volume up loudly and sing at the top of our lungs. I had the windows rolled up this time (after all, it was 24 degrees and snowing!), but still blasted and belted it.

Then, they played MMMBop. And I quickly changed the station.

People should smile more

It's not only a song by Newton Faulkner. It's true. (Maybe.)

Festivus for the rest of us

There's a light display on Public Square with a sign that says it was put there by some Catholic women's organization. It's surrounded by green yard signs wishing passersby a HAPPY NEW YEAR, HAPPY HOLIDAYS and HAPPY HANUKKAH.

Then there's a hand-written sign on white posterboard that says Merry Christmas.

Hear me roar

Yesterday was the 14th anniversary of my becoming a woman.

The party was lots of fun (back me up on this, Chrys).

It must be the voice

The radio wants me back :)

About those destinations...

I have more days off than I thought I did!