Floating flag

I ventured to beautiful Avon, Ohio this morning. You may know it as the home of Duck brand duct tape (they have an awesome duct tape festival each year; I learned how to make purses and wallets and spread duct tape joy when I went a couple years ago), but that has nothing to do with why I was there.

Why I was there isn't important. What is important is that on the way home, I saw an American flag blowing gently in the wind. Alone, this is not an unusual thing to see. What made this flag different -- dare I say special? -- is that instead of standing tall on a pole, it was suspended from a construction crane that was holding it high above the earth.

I kept looking for the pole. It was pretty cool.

At the movies

Last week, the Cleveland International Film Festival came to town. It was a pretty intense affair with some fantastic movies that I saw and many I did not.

I got to go to the opening film and a series of shorts, in addition to a normal evening movie after work. And although it wasn't the best movie that I saw, the best part of the festival was the chance to go see an hour-long film at lunchtime. There's just something wonderful about going to a midday movie that makes you feel like you're playing hooky in a wonderful sort of way.

Next year, you should follow suit.

Again with the fog

No pictures for you today, but I will tell you that the fog this afternoon was subtle. It was as if you woke up bleary-eyed, without your glasses, and rubbed your eyes against the blur. It made bridges fade into nothing, as if they were Photoshopped away. It gave the air a certain brightness.

It also felt as if you were walking into an industrial freezer upon stepping outside: that cold blast, sustained, the air unmoving, an eye-opening chill but not an unpleasant one.

Family

So, Today, I had visits from extended family. The family of Arielle. That is all.

A foggy day in Clevelandtown

Perhaps I have already mentioned my love of fog. Yesterday was a magnificent day -- because it started out foggy and ended up sunny and beautiful.

This foggy image arrived in my e-mail box this afternoon. It's Progressive Field, where the Indians play, as coated in clouds. Apparently this guy took it. You can also see a fogless shot on his page, but what's the fun in that?

Not like the goat

I got called a "good kid" today. While perhaps I should have been less than thrilled, instead it caused me to giggle.

The seven deadly

I used the phrase "cardinal sin" in a story I wrote today, and wanted to check to make sure I was using it properly. A Google search led me here on Wikipedia. Which made me very happy.

Ookk

I got to use the word "bookkeeper" in a story last week. Bookkeeper is one of my favorite words since some Encyclopedia Brown story (or something) that involved a discussion of words that had consecutive repeating letters. See: roommate, balloon. But few have three.

Using bookkeeper led me to peruse this Wikipedia page. Careful: may be addicting.

Hello, sunshine!

The best part about winter is that it begets spring. And this past week, spring arrived -- at least for a little while.

This means bright sunlight, melting snow and people wearing shorts and short sleeves. Broad smiles. Windswept hair. Drinks on patios. It's awesome.

I ate lunch outside the past few days, sitting on the stoop of my building with a book. This evening, I managed to spare a few minutes for an art walk -- something much harder to convince yourself to do if it's an art trudge. Yesterday's warm weather inspired a trip to Coventry and some super conversation.

You Southerners -- with your 70-degree Marches -- may think we're crazy. But I'll leave you with the weather report from the college radio station this morning:

"Exceptionally warm... 63 degrees... unbelievable!"

And that pretty much sums it up.

Snowman

He was on a main stretch of road and had a red scarf, carrot nose and stick arms. But the best part? Resting in his stick arm -- on his snow hip -- was a bottle of Coca-Cola.

If that's not a Coke commercial in the making (or is it one already?), I don't know what is.

Optimism

On the back of a truck for a cleaning service:

Vehicle makes frequent stops... hopefully!

It was also decorated with pictures of Leprechauns flitting about.

In the news

Two things to share with you, both from New York Times stories this week.

This, from a story about the new Olympic sport ski cross and its competitors, had me laughing loudly: "Others included Richard Spalinger of Switzerland, whose hobbies were announced as football, anger management and bowling."

And this, sweeter, is from an obituary of a guy who created a number of magazines. The quote is from his wife: “Would you say he was a strong outdoorsman? No, but he tried everything,” Mrs. Welsh said. “His whole motto was, ‘Life should be lived like a cavalry charge.’ ”

More about the snow

I realize it gets mentioned a lot, but it is omnipresent. So.

Over the past week, the snow has looked like flaked glass chips, confetti and grated Parmesan cheese. As well as plain old snow.

And when I had a visitor from Southern climes last weekend, he humored me by walking outside and saying, "Hey! It's snowing!" every time. (And yes, it was.) I had been lamenting the fact that my Southern friends got snow and were excited about it, while everyone here seems to be pretty much all snowed out.

It is a lot of snow.

So much so, in fact, that I got stuck in the driveway last week. My friendly neighbor pushed me out. So I made chocolate chip cookies in return. Yum.

I'm rich!

Cleaning out my wallet today, I discovered $40 tucked between receipts. And that's awesome.

Zebras

Thanks to Andi (and later, a string of amusing Facebook updates), I was tipped off to this tale of a zebra run amuck in Atlanta's streets.

Alone, this is amusing. But what makes it fantastic is the fact that this is the third zebra story to come out of Atlanta in as many years.

Take the case of Evidence, who was found grazing on the side of the highway, or Barcode, who was zebra-napped as a college prank. Something about Atlanta calls for zebra freedom, it seems.

What would you name your zebra? I think I would alter a friend's idea slightly and go with Red.

Snow flakes

Rumor has it that the Eskimos have many words for snow. It's certainly true that there are a plethora of ways a snowfall can manifest itself.

This afternoon, the snow was coming down in one of my favorite ways: as individual flakes. So when they landed on my black coat, I could see the different shapes and compare them to each other. No two alike, indeed.

Look, up in the sky!

There's just something so wonderful about the Goodyear blimp hanging over the skyline.

Black and white and read all over

First, a little bit about me.

I am not a morning person. I always mean to wake up early enough to take the bus to work, where I can leisurely read the paper, but then I do not. Instead, I drive to work.

But I still want to know the morning's news. And since there are many traffic lights on my commute, I read the paper on my way in. Mostly when I'm stopped at said lights, but so as not to lose my place, I drive with the paper in one hand, in my lap, where it sometimes flops over the steering wheel. This is how I arrive most mornings.

I work in a building without a parking lot, and frequently chat with the guy at the block-away lot whom I pay each morning to watch over my car. Mostly, it's just a good morning, but sometimes we wish each other happy weekends or talk about traffic. Or he warns me that I really should get up early enough to take the bus because there's some concert or game and the cost of the parking lot will go up tremendously the next day. I like him very much for giving me these warnings. We also occasionally laugh at the other drivers who slip on the ice when they get out of their cars. But that's just because people falling is funny, as long as they aren't hurt and they aren't you.

But this morning, I was a little nervous. You see, I was going to be on the radio to discuss a story I had written. And while I knew what there was to know about my story, I wanted to be well-informed about the stories the other guests were discussing, too. So while the paper was on my lap as I drove in, I was not reading it so as not to clutter my mind with information that would not be useful for on-the-air.

Of course, then, it's today that parking lot man chooses to tell me: "I love how you're always reading the paper."

I laughed, and told him it was the only time I had a chance. And wished him a good day.

It eased my pre-radio jitters.

Orange you glad?

I was walking into work yesterday when a guy holding his lunch passed me -- a container of pasta in his left hand, an orange in his right.

And as he walked, he tossed the orange up and down, again and again, into the air and back to his hand.

It looked so effortless. I would have dropped the orange.

You got the right one, baby

Someone had drawn a large winking smiley face, in red marker, on the back of a Pepsi truck I drove past the other day.

I'm a Coke loyalist, but it was still pretty cool.

Everything's better in British

Even corrections. Take, for example, this e-mail:

Apologies for our mailing system’s spell-check wrongly correcting Andrew Sentance’s name which of course is not spelt Sentence. Feel free to subject me to the kind of vitriol I deserve for not turning it off first.

Yes, that's all it said.

In a winter wonderland

I caught snowflakes with my tongue today.

Joy

Two of my very best friends had very good things happen to them this weekend. Engagement rings and babies -- oh my!

I had a successful potluck and movie marathon. But that hardly compares. So, dudes: Congratulations! I'm excited for both of you, and for all involved.

Tresses

I discovered last weekend that my brother and I have practically the same haircut. His is just slightly shorter. He did not think this was as funny as I did.

And today I saw a guy with curly, chin-length hair dash between a store and his car. His hair bounced. It was fantastic.

For your reading pleasure

A friend from college, Voracious_Boot, has taken to chronicling her mother's care packages, e-mails and phone calls at shitmymomsendsme.blogspot.com -- I find it hysterical. Maybe you will, too.

Vowels

I spent way too much time today (really: any time at all) looking for words that have all five vowels after typing "Sequoia" and realizing that it has all five vowels.

That sparked a conversation at work about how "Sequoia" would be a very expensive word on "Wheel of Fortune" and the enjoyment that can be derived from reading words backwards.

Go ahead, try it. I'll wait.

Some all-vowel words (and other fun language facts) here and here.

Oh, shovelers

I've been meaning to say so for days, but people with snow shovels, plows and salt have been making my life so much happier as of late. Walking on a clean sidewalk and driving on a cleared street -- the joy that comes from that mid-winter cannot be overstated.

I didn't have my camera with me when I ventured a little further into snowbelt territory today, but the trees had what looked like a foot of snow on their branches. In many cases, it looked like someone had tossed a white sheet or a big, fluffy blanket over the trees -- you could just see the shape of them and the tips of branches underneath a glistening pile of snow.

Winter weather

When I look out the window, I feel as if I'm in a snow globe. The clumps of flakes are drifting every which way.

It almost looks like a gentle swarm of moths has taken to the sky.

ahhh, sweet Christmas.

Several Amazing things happened this Christmas for me, which I feel that I should share.

1) I was blessed with Christmas Ale from one very awesome friend up North. Not only this, but I got to share this blessing with 3 new people. I am not sure that I have quite converted them to Great Lakes Minions yet, but I feel the seed has been planted.

2) I had an amazing "Christmas Part 2" Dinner with my family on the 27th of Reuben and Christmas Ale. A Real Cleveland Christmas despite not being able to travel up north this year.

3) My boyfriends family has completely brought me in to the fold. I recieved a "Santa Bag" from them this year. A tradition that they have had since the boys were little (mind you, the youngest boy is now 31.) Andy's sister in law also got one this year. She married in to the family 9 years ago. I felt rather special and loved.

4) My boyfriend, in a moment of weakness, has agreed to let me get a full sized tree for the house tomorrow. My slow takover of Christmas has begun.

For a Christmas Spent away from home and my family of origin (parents and sis were in Cleve with the extended family on Xmas day.) It was really quite nice and heartwarming. Even going in to work from 5-10 was kind of nice.

Bring it to the public's awareness!

Yesterday, while driving through Atlanta on the Downtown Connector, I saw a large billboard that said, "Google this: puppy mills."
Enough said.

It makes me happy

When people who I like like each other. And there's been a good bit of that in recent weeks.

Super awesome dark chocolate also makes me happy. Yum.

A happy 2010 to all y'all!

Hodgepodge

Yesterday, I saw a car with Christmas lights -- lit up -- strung through and around the roof rack.

There was a flock of birds that looked like an amoeba, pulsing in and out as the fowl dodged about in the wind.

In the mailbox, there was a Christmas card from our mail carrier. Also, in Sunday's paper, one from the delivery person.

Holidays are a great time for real mail. And visitors who are returning to see family. Sometimes, those visitors even have boxes of awesomeness.

Business-class flights include free alcohol.

I've just finished the first 24 hours of what will be an amazing week of delicious Indian food and fantastic friends. And a fluffy dog.

Good tidings, y'all.

And then we eat it

See this house? It's a pretty impressive house, right?

Now... imagine it made out of candy.

All the more amazing, right?

I went to the Cleveland Botanical Garden with a friend today to see the gingerbread houses (I can't seem to find pictures from this year's, and neither of us brought a camera), and was expecting some impressive work -- like the gingerbread treehouse, for example, or some pretty cute gingerbread churches. But we also saw that house. And it was amazing.

Also exciting? My brand new hat (It's the Yeti, but in Monster blue).

Regret the error

When journalists make mistakes in their work, they're supposed to acknowledge and fix those mistakes at the next possible opportunity -- in the next day's paper, by fixing it in an online story, by announcing the mistake on-air. I can really only speak for newspapers, but most, if not all, have a space for those corrections, often on page two.

There's a great Web site that tracks corrections, called Regret the Error. It gets the name from the last sentence of many corrections, which is often the publication saying that it does, in fact, regret having made the error.

They're often entertaining and interesting reads. But I want to call your attention to the 2009 best-of list.

The funny doesn't really start until four screens down (skip the fact-checking part unless you're inherently interested in that sort of thing and start with the Correction of the Year).

I'll let you read the correction itself, which is most unfortunate. And a number of the corrections contained in the list (or more appropriately, the mistakes that were made that led to the corrections being on that list) were hysterical. But the thing that made me laugh out loud while sitting at work was a Twitter meme referring to that correction of the year. Its hashtag is #washingtonpostcorrections and in case they're off the screen by the time you search it, it includes such gems as:

• PamPF99 Please note that The Monkees are in fact believers, and not heretics as reported. The Post regrets the error. #washingtonpostcorrections
• mistabaka: Mo money does not, as was reported, bring mo problems, we regret the error. #washingtonpostcorrections
• cobrown: Snoop Dogg did not, as we reported, contract the plague. It was his chronic that was bubonic. #washingtonpostcorrections
• jsmooth995: George Clinton has assured us his roof remains intact, and he takes fire safety quite seriously. #washingtonpostcorrections
• sethlipkin There is, in fact, a mountain high enough. The Post regrets the error. #washingtonpostcorrections
• nolamomma Dr. Dre is IN Public Enemy. He is not considered by law enforcement to be A public enemy. #washingtonpostcorrections

You get the picture.

And some real corrections (from the best-of) to whet your palate:

Toronto Sun: A headline on page one of the Toronto Sun yesterday was both inaccurate and misleading. In fact, as the story reported, the mother of a boy involved in a high school fight in Keswick said her son “said something stupid.” She did not say nor imply he was stupid. The Sun regrets the error and apologizes to the boy and his family.

Los Angeles Times: Bear sighting: An item in the National Briefing in Sunday’s Section A said a bear wandered into a grocery story in Hayward, Wis., on Friday and headed for the beer cooler. It was Thursday.

On Dasher, on Dancer...

Better, even, than seeing a mounted policeman?

A mounted policeman whose horse is wearing a Santa cap.

And as an added bonus: a Prius with the license plate "MO MPG."

Text message from my brother

You should start wearing a wwjd bracelet and whenever you look at it think, what would Jared do? :)

Damaged goods

I got this from a local law firm, and had to share the first paragraph:

The Consignee Has a Duty to Accept a Damaged Shipment

If girls were like consignees, I would have had a lot more dates in high school. The reason being, a consignee has a duty to accept, and cannot reject, a damaged shipment from the carrier, unless the goods are considered to be worthless. As a skinny kid with acne, I was certainly a damaged shipment, but I would not have considered myself worthless. I mean, I was on the football team and I even had a short stint with a garage band.

I think that says it all.

Or, the start of the next Scream movie

I have stalkers. You can tell from two subsequent text messages I got yesterday afternoon.

The first, at 4:15 p.m. -- "I'm by your house!"

The second, at 4:25 p.m. -- "I'm in ur house!"

OK -- the first was from my sister, who was in the neighborhood for what must have been a late lunch. And the second was from a friend who is staying with me this week, and who was kind enough to let me know my keys didn't give her any trouble.

But I was mightily amused by the timing and content.

Loosen those belts

I like cranberry sauce. And tomorrow's cranberry day.

Enjoy, everyone, and happy Thanksgiving!

Let them eat... meat!

I'm a vegetarian. So the turkey-shaped cake -- complete with frosting drumsticks -- that a couple friends got me this weekend for my birthday was particularly amusing.

Never mind that it said Happy Thanksgiving or that it tasted nothing like turkey flesh (I'm only assuming here). It looked like the real thing, and it's not often you get to carve, not cut, a cake.

I'll post a picture if I get emailed any.

'Tis the season

The past couple days, I've come across workers stringing lights on downtown trees and buildings. This is nice, first of all, because it's starting to be dusk-verging-on-dark when I leave work, and the lights add some brightness. Second of all, I thought it was neat that the lights are on when they're strung.

Presumably, this is so they can make sure the whole string is working or see that they're appropriately spaced as they're being hung. But I liked it because it was just neat to see a long string of light move so elegantly.

Hehehehehehe

While leaving the psychology building this afternoon, I saw a female midget sitting on the front steps leading up to the building. I find midgets highly entertaining, for some peculiar reason: every midget I see makes me smile and clap my hands gleefully. Maybe because I think they'd make a good pet? Or maybe a meal? (Of course, there's always that morbid sense of curiosity about midget porn, but that's an entirely different bucket of worms.....)

Feliz cumpleanos

Today's my sister's birthday... and her friends blew up 150 balloons and filled her room with them. It reminded me of the ball rooms at amusement parks when I was little and looks like lots of fun.

Crunch

I jumped in a big pile of leaves yesterday.

Twice.

In my work clothes.

It's the only reason I watched it

On my flight to Puerto Rico this morning (which, in itself, is another very, very pleasantest thing!), the in-flight movie was called "I Hate Valentine's Day." Although the movie itself was pretty lame, there was one scene where the leading lady -- who was obviously on some combination of lithium and ecstasy throughout first 4/5th of the film -- angrily throws something mushy (I couldn't tell what it was) against a wall, screaming, "Valentine's Day BLOWS!!!!" I almost cheered audibly; the change in attitude was a complete 180 from her previous "Love is wonderful, dating is so much fun, Valentine's Day is the best day EVER!!" mentality.
Isn't bitterness fun??? :-D

Shiny objects

I got complimented twice at Starbucks today, by two different baristas. One said he liked my necklace (which is an abalone shell that I got for my bat mitzvah, though I can't for the life of me remember who it's from -- and now that's kind of bothering me; it looks vaguely like an oilie sticker -- who remembers those?), then asked the other barista if he liked my necklace. Barista two was not impressed.

Barista two, though, thought my credit card was pretty sweet. It has a picture of a daisy (or something) on it, and was apparently different enough to stand out.

Does anyone else get compliments on their credit cards? That happens to me more than I think is normal, but maybe people are just super-impressed by unusual card markings.

Just... wow

I will add no commentary to this, except to say it's probably inappropriate (maybe not in a NSFW way, but kind of bordering on it) and I really, really love the generous use of asterisks. Really love.

Oh, and you should really click and read it. Obviously.

Three things

I totally love Where the Wild Things Are, which I've seen twice. It's definitely not for everybody, but the emotion of it really made me smile, even when the story was sad.

I had a delicious egg salad sandwich at a downtown restaurant today. The secret ingredient? Truffle oil. Yeah, I think that'll make anything taste good.

Yesterday's mail included a long-expected postcard from a dear friend. I'd been anticipating a letter, but this was above what I thought would come -- a postcard with our faces on it, taken from the summer's golf carting adventure. It was unexpected and sweet.

On the road again

While running errands today, I drove past a "Lord of Life Pumpkin Patch" and an alpaca farm. There were about 20 outside grazing. I was pretty psyched.

Why Halloween is super, and other tales

Yesterday was the fun-filled conclusion of Cleveland Beer Week, which included much quality friend time, out-of-city visitors and adorable miniature beer steins with a doctored (to say BEER) FREE stamp logo on them. It was pretty wonderful and delicious.

But that's not why you're here, exactly (although, the fact that there's a homebrewing group called the Society of Northeast Ohio Brewers -- allowing them to get the Web site beersnobs.org -- is pretty fantastic and grin-worthy). You're here, instead, so I can tell you that when we were driving in, I saw a man driving past in white face-paint, done up like a mime. But with glasses, which makes it all the more surreal.

And so I can tell you that a friend of mine, who body paints in his free time, painted two friends and myself as a dog, a cat and a mouse one October a few years ago. We bought tails and ears and looked the part, and decided the perfect thing to do was to go out to a bar.

And can you believe that not a single person -- not the waitress, not anyone we walked past -- even mentioned our attire? Lesson learned: dress up oddly in non-October months for maximum effect. The process and the company were still entertaining, though.

Animals in the street

But in a good way. Not in a bad way.

This weekend, my friends and I stumbled on the Lakewood pet parade. Dogs in costumes are kind of fantastic. There were a couple people dressed as Cruella de Vil with their dogs -- which were not Dalmatians -- sporting Dalmatian costumes. One of my co-workers had the family dog in a life vest and a Salty Dog hat. There were vikings, a lobster and any other number of adorably clad canines.

The winners, my co-worker said, were a dog duo: a pug that was wearing horns and made to look like a bull (and was apparently very realistic) and another, smaller dog, that was made up like a bull fighter.

Yesterday, there was a mounted policeman (as in, a man on a horse) on the streets downtown. And this morning, there was a truck with four trailers attached, all with the Ringling name on the sides. It was very Dumbo.

Holy Boss's Day, Batman!

My brother has a job where he is in charge of people. He keeps claiming that these people like him, but I thought that was just something that brothers said to sisters to prove how awesome they are. Until tonight.

Friday, as you may have known, was Boss's Day. It's the best day for sucking up to someone who decides whether you keep your job -- well, the best day other than every other day. And my brother's employees went all out.

The card wasn't enough. Nor was the sign they made describing him as "Da Boss." A cassata cake, delicious as it was (And man, was it delicious. And gigantic. I think it was a full sheet.) just didn't cut it.

On top of all of that (and that's obscene already, from where I stand!), the co-workers went in together to get him a #23 Cavs jersey -- that's LeBron James' number, for those of you who don't follow basketball.

On the back, though? My brother's name.

I was in hysterics at the efforts, but I guess it means they really do like him!

Let it snow

This is really Danny's tale to tell, but I'm going to take it from him. Because I can. And because he can add his version, too, complete with details.

Text message at 3:03 p.m. Thursday: Omg it's snowing!!

My response, at 3:14 p.m.: :) That's early! A lot? Is it wonderful?

Text message at 3:15 p.m.: Haha! Just flurries, sort of sprinkling rain with it. But yes, I think it's neat, altho no one else seems to

Text message at 5:03 p.m.: I take it back, it's really coming down now!! Haha this is awesome!

He promised pictures.

Other people? Less excited.

I AM the news

OK, I'm not really. But I could have been!

The NBC affiliate called me this afternoon, wanting to interview me for a story that related to an article I wrote last week.

I said no -- I was swamped today, and that's not really my thing anyway -- but it's certainly flattering to be asked.

Balloon magic

There was an article in the Wall Street Journal last week about -- of all things -- the increasing artistry of balloon twisting. As in, the clowns (usually) who make hats or dogs or swords (and I thought a rocking horse was the epitome of cool).

Now, they're way beyond that. And way into installment art. And amazingness.

Check out the slide show. For real.

More bikes!

Two instances of no-handed amazingness, all in one day. I was more impressed by the guy who was riding a bike no-handed while carrying a box -- a decently sized box, too, and he even managed to turn left (though there may have been a hand touchdown) -- than I was the guy who was talking on his cell phone with one hand and smoking with the other. But when he nearly dropped, then juggled, then caught his cigarette, it made it all OK.

As a bikeless bonus, there was also a maroon limo. Has anyone ever seen a maroon limo? I thought not.

Can I toucha-toucha-toucha touch them?

On the shuttle to work (school) this morning, the lady across from me was wearing fishnet stockings. The only other times I've seen them in use has been at the Rocky Horror Picture Show. She looked pretty bad-ass in them too; I wanted to say something, but withheld due to the likely creepiness factor.

You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

OK, it's not exact. But it's what I thought of when I saw a license plate that said LORD ICY.

They probably meant: Lord, I see why.

I read it as a shout-out to the White Witch in the Chronicles of Narnia.

It's alarming how charming I feel

One of my (male) coworkers said to my (male) boss this morning, "Wow, you look nice today!"

My boss replied by saying -- then singing -- "I feel pretty." (It doesn't start til the 50-second mark.)

I tried not to guffaw.

Mail

I got two unexpected pieces of mail -- and one of them, adorably enough, was an invitation to a first birthday party. How cute.

To reciprocate, I sent three pieces today of what will likely be unexpected mail when they arrive. OK, two of them are unexpected -- I didn't have the last address I needed.

Even so, the content is a surprise!

It's not Eureka, but still

Today during our lab meeting, my professor said, "By Jove." It was cute because it's so, so, so stereotypically professor-ish.

Water, water everywhere

In case you haven't heard, it's pretty wet in Atlanta these days.

I came across this picture (tweeted by a friend who's now living in Philadelphia) and was amazed by how beautiful it was. This, actually, is my favorite spot in Atlanta -- it's a bridge that's always covered in the most beautiful graffiti. In addition to just being a gorgeous scene, I'm jealous that these guys were able to take such a leisurely trip through it.

Lovely.

Yiddish curses

Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish new year, was this weekend, and part of the rabbi's sermon today had most of the congregation doubled over in their seats laughing.

He began by lamenting the cursing of recent times -- not the fact that there is cursing, mind you, but the fact that we aren't more creative about it. Yiddish curses, he said, start off sounding like a blessing -- but then there's a twist. My favorite, which I've used more than once, is this: May you grow like an onion, with your head in the ground and your feet in the air.

Others include: May you lose all your teeth but one, and may you get a toothache in the one you have left; May you have a sweet death, may you be run over by a sugar truck; May you be like a chandelier, hanging all day and burning all night. You get the picture.

So now I'm contemplating good curses. (Some others are here -- enjoy!)

Names

One of my friends is having a baby, and doesn't yet have names picked out. This means I get to pore through baby name books and make suggestions.

Of course, I'll be pleased if my suggestions stick. In the meantime, though, I'm happy enough to learn that the female form of Xerxes is Sherry -- and that it means "pertaining to Caeser."

Names rock my world.

On paper

One thing spotty Internet access will lead you to is the written word. Like, on paper.

As such, I've been spending a lot of time with cookbooks, instead of looking up recipes online. And coming across things that look delicious, but that I wouldn't have thought to make, had I not flipped past them. Like tonight's frittata. Yum. Mushroom leek risotto is next on the list.

And this weekend brought a trip to the library, which meant three unread (adult) Roald Dahl books. Maybe no computer (I'm on a borrowed one right now) isn't all bad.

What's up, Doc?

Last week, I went to Blossom to see a performance of Looney Tunes and Merrie Melodies music, complete with cartoons. This was super-adorable and fun.

But the thing thing that made me really grin? At the end of the show, instead of tossing flowers on the stage, someone brought a bunch of carrots to the conductor.

Bugs Bunny, indeed.

On a completely unrelated note, I have a dead computer. So I will once again be sporadic, at least until a new one is acquired. Anyone have suggestions for awesome new or horribly awful computers?

America's Roller Coast

If this doesn't make you smile, then I don't know what to say to you!

Maybe try one of the other ones, I guess. (In other words: A day well-spent.)

I hope a rhyming dictionary was involved

Because otherwise, why would the Black Eyed Peas rhyme "mazel tov" with "take it off" in the song "I Gotta Feeling"?

They did add a "l'chaim" in for good measure, though.

The future is the past

I saw a woman hula-hooping on the sidewalk today. She was really good -- it was going up and down her torso to her neck, over a shoulder, on an arm. I was impressed. Much better than me -- either IRL or on a Wii.


And then, a limo that had doors that opened up, like a DeLorean. I wanted to stop and stare, but the light was green.

Hey, mister... can I have a ride?

One of my co-workers interviewed a German steel magnate at his Gates Mills home (for example) today. He came back talking about how impressive it was -- the driveway til forever, the giant house, all the trees. The carved wooden table. The fact that everything in the house looked like it was an antique. The organ that the house had been built around, that played through the vents.

And this magnate, after the interview, invited my co-worker to lunch with him at the country club. But my co-worker declined, deciding he had to get back to the office instead.

Just one problem.

The magnate had just flown in from Germany. His wife had the corvette. Could he get a ride to the country club anyway?

I don't remember what kind of car my co-worker said he had, but it was a 1990 something with CDs all over the seat. And that's how the magnate got to the country club.

But no one knows how he got home...

Don't forget your sheath

From the Web site of the Ohio Renaissance Festival: (It's in caps lock, so you know it's important!)

PLEASE OBSERVE THE VILLAGE POLICIES: NO PETS. NO OUTSIDE FOOD OR BEVERAGE MAY BE BROUGHT INTO FESTIVAL.
ALL WEAPONS MUST BE TIED IN A SHEATH AT ALL TIMES.

Mr. Golden Sun

Drove past a car on the way home that had a giant sun, branches and a ladybug painted on the side. It was lovely and creative and fun. And way better than the original wood paneling, too!

Board game mania

I played a lot of board games this weekend, which I love.

But I need to give a special bit of glee to games of Scrabble that net words like xenon (mine) and quinoa (not).

Also, the "xenon" game had only two words that were more than one syllable (ova was the other). I thought that was pretty amusing. Especially since the words were still good ones -- like jeered and thrall.

And it feels just as hot, too.

As I was driving to Peoples State Forest this evening (which is a story that most definitely does NOT make me smile...... at all), I passed the most awesomest thing ever: Satan's Kingdom Road. And then, as if things couldn't get better, I passed Satan's Kingdom Recreation Area!! And you can go tubing there as well!
I squealed gleefully in my car. Multiple times. I think Connecticut just clawed its way into the top 5 of the "Best States Ever" list.

Busting makes me feel good

As if Ghost Busters on the big screen wasn't enough... the half-dozen guys (and a girl) who sat in front of us totally came in costume.

And one even had a light-up pack!

Banana banana

I make a mean banana bread. But today, I made these with my overripe bananas instead.

The frosting has yet to be done, but the cake part is delish.

Wilbur

I went to the fair today (technically, yesterday) and had a fantastic time walking the Midway, riding a Ferris wheel and getting my fair-food fix -- lemonade, french fries, fried cheese, fried pickles and, of course, an elephant ear.

But it was the animals at the fair that particularly made me smile. To be precise, it was the piglets.

Let me back up and tell you that we saw the horses and cows, sheep and rabbits, guinea pigs and chicken. We pet quite a few goats (and one of them nibbled at my purse). We oohed and ahhed at llamas and alpacas (which looked exactly like walking stuffed animals) and giggled at turkeys and ducks.

But in the back of one of the barns were two sows, each with a number of piglets -- maybe 10 for one and six for another. They were pink and soft and tiny with big eyes. Both sows were sleeping; one was surrounded by sleeping piglets (and the poor piglet that found itself under her neck when she went to roll over! -- my, what a squeal) while the other had piglets clambering all over her in search of food.

Nursing piglets are way too cute.

The nursing piglets had a definite runt of the litter, a pig that was half the size of the others. It made me think of Wilbur, which wasn't much of a leap since county fairs already conjure up Charlotte's Web images.

A fair is a veritable smorgasbord, orgasbord, orgasbord...

My sister's awesome

She just is.

(She told me to say that. But it remains fact.)

Tampico

This is why I love love love the Big Band station.

It played a version of this song, which I was merrily humming along to, when all of a sudden the (redundant) lyrics changed... to "we're getting sick of this song" and "it's repetitious and long." All in a very cheery, Big Band-y sort of way. I chuckled. And tried to find the same version at home, but couldn't.

How 'bout that?

I drove home super-psyched after bowling with a friend tonight because not only did I break 100 in all three games -- 112, 116, 102 -- but I bowled a turkey, a definite first. But then, 116 is also my high score.

So there I was, thrilled with my bowling victories, about to pull into the driveway, when I was blinded by a bright light right on the curb. We're talking bright lights. Like, the kind they use to make it look like daylight during road construction. And there was another one on the neighbor's lawn, and what looked like a giant projection screen, too.

I decided to go explore.

It turns out that my neighbor works for an ad agency and that the lights (and plastic forks stuck in the lawn) were part of a campaign they're filming for Hot Pockets. It has something to do with senior citizens who are mad that people are eating without utensils and stick forks in the lawn (Oh, the beauty of Google) to protest. If you see it (I think they said it's for the Web, not TV), you should watch. And send me a link, so I can see how it came out.

I talked to one of the senior citizen (his words) actors, who's a civil engineer by day and has done seven commercials and roles as extras, this year, by night. It's a little random for a Wednesday night, but certainly cool.

Although I'm still proud of my turkey.

I think I can

It wasn't The Little Engine That Could, but I think the transportation story can be extended to boats.

While having lunch at the river today, I saw a tugboat pushing a barge (we'll pretend that I know the different names of water-faring vessels and that I got that one right -- which, if Wikipedia is to be believed, is a possibility). The barge (for lack of better knowledge) was rust-colored, low and long, while the tugboat was bright red and looked just like a bathtub toy.

It was groovy. And it was totally this boat. Which, for the record, is also the one shown above.

Come fly the friendly skies

In case any of you want to come visit (hint, hint), the Akron-Canton airport and AirTran are offering $25 off your next ticket to or from our lovely metropolis. And there's even an AirTran sale for the next few weeks! Get it while the getting's good.

You just have to travel by the end of January.

Aaaaand we're back

Getting let out of work early on Friday afternoons.

Strange farmers' market finds -- such as the husk cherry, a fruit a friend said tastes like buttered toast. I'm still not sure that I see it.

Tea at the Ritz, followed by a (touring) Broadway show.

Interesting books. Beach. Cooking. Conversation. Company.

Meaningful moments with friends. Random moments with friends. Being butted off of Twister boards by friends.

Knowing that friends care enough to show up, even with little notice.

Good news. Good food.

Tourists trying to tip a trolley driver because he chatted with them about Asheville (where they're from) and gave them some suggestions about what to do and where to go.

Air conditioning. I contemplated driving around this afternoon, just so I could have it. In the end, the book I was reading won out.

Church bells

I managed to time the drive home to be outside a church at 6, when the bells began to toll. It's a lovely sound. Wind blowing through windows, music in the air. I like it.

Pineapples

I had a late meeting today and ended up walking back to my car from a direction I don't usually come from. As I headed past a gated parking lot, I noticed that the fence posts were topped with pineapples.

Psych always has pineapples, too.

Often, it's the little things.

From scratch

I came home one day last week to a new oven, which is enough to put a smile on anyone's face in and of itself. I had company, and we inaugurated it with brownies-from-a-box. Which were good. But for some reason, I was feeling slightly more ambitious today.

I'm going out of town (again) and have been trying to eliminate some of the perishable things from the fridge before they, you know, perish. So I had one egg left in a dozen. Since I've also avoided going to the store to add more things to the list of items I must consume, I ran out of junk food to pack in my lunch. Baking chocolate chip cookies, then, was the perfect solution to both of those problems.

This certainly isn't the first time I've made cookies from scratch, but it has been a while. And they turned out well, if I may say so. If you see me in the next week, ask for one -- they're chocolate chip-pecan, and most delectable.

Better than a mullet

I was distracted from the Indians game I went to tonight (we lost) by the man who sat down in front of me late in the game.

He was in his late 50s or 60s with glasses and a grey mustache -- unremarkable. But his hair... oh, his hair. It was solid grey, bordering on white. It was buzzed to the crown of his head and on the sides. But from the top of his head to the nape of his neck, there were long, flowing grey locks. It was scraggly and ended midway down his back. And it was the most bizarre haircut I have ever seen.

I was at the game with my grandfather, and had to point it out. He was also confounded.

Funny story

My parents are vacationing in the Seattle area (at least that's where they started out) and called to ask for help finding a hotel in.... Forks, Washington.

Sadly, the significance of the location was not lost on me. Although I don't think they'll be making use of any of the themed tours. God, I hope not.

Movies under the stars

Atlanta has this event, Screen on the Green, that I looked forward to every summer. It's just as it sounds -- a giant movie screen on Piedmont Park, a picnic dinner with your friends and thousands of people screaming, "Don't open that door!"

Tonight, I went to a Cleveland event called Wade Oval Wednesdays (both of these happen multiple times throughout the summer) -- and despite the amount of fun I always had at Screen on the Green, I think WOW has Atlanta beat.

From 6 to 9 p.m., there was an Irish band. There were falafel, pizza, popcorn, gyros, fresh-sliced watermelon and odd-flavored (but tasty) ice-cream sandwiches to eat. They sold beer and other beverages, alcoholic and non- (and my blueberry beer had a handful of blueberries tossed into the glass!). There were local vendors selling jewelry and t-shirts. The sky was a gorgeous shade of purple. The air was warm.

Then, right as it was getting dark, The Goonies. Everybody laughed in all the right spots, booed in all the right spots. But it wasn't as crowded (we're losing population, after all!) and the city provided chairs. Less to lug and better traffic when you left.

I didn't like The Goonies the first time I saw it (before you start throwing things at me, appalled, remember that this was just two or three years ago -- I didn't grow up with it as a child), but it was lovely under the stars.

Free money

Technically, I earned it. But the check was still unexpected.

Every once in a while, money falls from the sky. It's nice when that happens.

If only they weren't gelatinous

My brother, walking into the room with a bag of them: "Marshmallows always make me feel happy when I'm feeling bad."

Job well done

I'm pretty psyched because now I can say I'm an award-winning journalist. I won several awards -- jointly, individually and as part of my paper's staff -- for coverage of a big story on my beat last year. And since I took over in the middle and was still learning the ropes, it's all very cool. Not that it wouldn't be cool if I'd been doing it a while.

But I was also excited because the awards -- and the subsequent story the paper wrote about them -- garnered me a few e-mails and one note of congratulations. The notice is nice, of course, but what was even cooler was the sentiment expressed. The CEO of a company I write about sent me a letter that said, "It's nice to know (my company) is being covered by someone with your talent." Pretty rocking.

Also, I'm really pleased with some digging I did on a story this week. It's been a little while since I got to break news.

Huzzah!

Shout outs

To awesome friends. One helped me break into my house last night (my climbing through a window in a skirt is a very elegant sight, let me tell you) and another is giving me his keys so I have a place to stay on this trip, even though he's out of town.

That's some pretty good friend-moves for 24 hours. Thanks, dudes, (and all the rest of you, too) for rocking my world!

Away, away

Just a quick note to say that computer annoyances and travels will be making me scarce. Hope to add grins when I have the chance, but I can tell you in the meantime that despite what anyone may tell you, any town that has a dedicated golf cart parking lot at a place of employment, an ice cream truck on the real streets and a lemonade stand set up on the golf cart trails is officially adorable. Even if it does make some residents feel like they're in a scene out of A Wrinkle in Time (pretend I put links in appropriate places).

It was good to see those of you I saw on the last trip and I'm looking forward to the ones to come!

The oh so most joyful!

Seeing Rel, even if for less than 24 hours.
Oh, and flavour tripping.... with Rel, none the less!
AAAND golf-carting with Rel!

Tasty

I picked strawberries this weekend, and woke up early Saturday to go to the farmers' market. Only the brie I ate for dinner (and the olive oil I cooked some veggies in) came from the grocery store. And that was a pretty exciting thing.

Relatedly, I also had my first cooking foray into exotic mushrooms. I've eaten some before, but never by my own hand. And my goodness, were they delicious (brown oyster mushrooms on toast, sauteed with olive oil and garlic scapes). Plus, the mushroom man at the market said they were a good "starter" 'shroom. So y'all should feel free to experiment with brown oyster mushrooms. The dude says it's cool, and I say it's delectable.

Text messages

This falls under the saved-for-posting category.

My friends, awesome as they are, sometimes send me pretty wonderful text messages detailing their own amusements (or, I'm just amused by their insanity). I'll recount a few of them for you below. (And you may well recognize yourself here. That's right -- I saved it. Though now that I'm saving them here, I can probably free up some much-needed cell phone memory and delete.)

Oh, and I left the punctuation/capitalization/etc. alone:

There is a ton of dirt on the Dooley statue and a sign that says "Wash me! --Wash U"

Coolest Halloween costume ever: Sylvia Plath. Wear a bathrobe and carry an Easy Bake Oven

Can you steal an amish child and keep it as a pet? Or is that only permissible with midgets?

OMG the m&ms I'm eating are so good I needed to tell someone!

I just saw an ice cream truck! I think it was playing, sewanee river. I don't know how to spell that. The truck itself was unadorned which was sad

I just saw a shirt that said 'i was raised on the street' and it had a picture of the sesame street characters.

There was a possum just sitting on the sidewalk as i just walked past your house. It sat there and swiveled its head and looked at me. Crazy!

Keep 'em coming!

More wheeled fun

We're back to two-wheeled bicycles for the moment because I saw a couple with baskets, and they were snazzy. One was like a grocer's basket at the front of the bike -- oversized, black mesh, nothing fancy. The other was a white wicker one with flowers that looked like it had been pulled off a kid's bike and made to fit an adult's. Both were way cool.

Then there was a police Segway (or some reasonable variation of a Segway) and that was purely amusing.

Unicycle

Walking out of work this afternoon, I was passed by someone on a bike, which is not an odd occurrence. Until I realized that the bike had only one wheel.

And to make matters even better than just the fact that there was a dude unicycling down the street (I say dude, though I'm not sure if it was a guy or a girl -- I only saw from behind, and the hair didn't help), there's this: said dude had a plastic grocery bag in his/her right hand. And that bag contained a frozen pizza.

He/she totally unicycled to the corner store to get dinner. Which rocks.

Reach for the stars!

As I was driving home this afternoon, the guy in the car next to me had his moon roof open. And his right arm was sticking out the top, like if he had been resting his left arm on the windowsill (is that the proper phrasing for the car window's edge?), but in the sky.

It looked pretty funny, the disembodied hand in the air. And I started laughing because I drive like that, too. And I'd never seen anyone else do it before. A little disconcerting, as a bystander.

Also, I won concert tickets from the radio for recognizing the theme to Mad Men, which is a super-awesome show. This is the second time that's happened in a year! Hooray free concert tickets.

Lastly, I've been at my job a year now. It doesn't feel like that long at all. And that's pretty cool. So happy work-iversary to me.